Tag Archives: goals

Brain Storm

Have you ever had so many big ideas, so many huge hopes, so many big dreams that you begin to feel a little lost in the midst of your brain storm?

I’ve definitely been there, and in fact frequently am there when I let my mind wander – but I’m beginning to learn how to dance in the downpour.

Lately YouTube has worked its way into my “chill out” routine, and recently I found myself watching a new video by one of my favorite YouTubers, Olan Rogers. Watching his videos has made my spurts of quirkiness seem far less weird, and far more entertaining, and now that I’m thinking about it, that channel has definitely helped my self-confidence grow in some small, comedic, lighthearted way.

In this short vlog he discusses allowing yourself to be “greedy with your dreams…have ten! Have twenty! You’re allowed to be greedy with that,” and not letting one dream “stress you out so much…making you a little miserable, because you want it so bad.” While it’s certainly not necessary (and probably not helpful!) to give up on the big dream(s), not letting those big dreams consume you to the point where they develop into a massive, dark thunderhead that blocks out all the other wonderful things you can do might be key, for your own sake (and maybe for everyone around you, too ^_^).

And who knows, the other things you do on your journey may end up being the exact  mismatched building blocks you needed to climb that Everest of a dream! The point is, we shouldn’t allow dream paralysis to happen. I’m preaching to myself, here.

Does it seem too big? Too impossible? Too far in the distance?

Try writing it down, and then lift that burden off yourself, and seize the day! Yes, this day, this beautiful moment you have. How do you want to fill it? Who do you want to be in it? What are one of the small dreams that you know you want to, and can accomplish within the next hour, the next day? Start there, it’s OK! Better than OK, it’s a profound part of growth! A seed doesn’t instantly shoot up out of the ground the second it’s planted, and neither do we – every stage, step, and growth spurt is important.

After watching that video I was inspired, and instead of not “going for it” because it was “unrealistic,” I acted – I grabbed some sticky notes, a favorite pen, and began rapidly jotting down each drop of an idea as it fell from my brain storm cloud (which evidently had desperately needed to rain). It was incredibly fun, and now instead of being “bored,” I can look at all of those sticky notes and choose one thing that either accomplishes, or moves me towards, one of the many “smaller” dreams that I’ve allowed to sprout up. So far, it has been a more fun, freeing, and, dare I say, fulfilling, way of thinking and living than how I was thinking and living before.

Obviously old habits die hard, and I still catch myself starting to beat myself up for not “being there,” with “x, y, or z” – but I’ve given myself grace even in those moments, and it helps the anxiety wear off much quicker, and creates needed space for peace.

I guess to summarize in my incredibly corny, earthy-metaphor way –

we’re all growing, and we’re all growing at different paces and places. That’s fantastic! Don’t fear your big dreams, don’t give up on them, and leave room for other dreams to grow. You can plant a whole huge dream garden if you want, with seeds for massive trees, seasonal fruits and veggies, flowers and hedges. Pick out the weeds of bad ideas, and embrace a beautiful wild flower every now and then. You can even share seeds with others and vice versa, and visit their idea/dream gardens when you want to be inspired or find out how they make their gardens grow

And when those brain storms blow in, breathe easy, and let it rain 🙂

 

With peace in Christ and life,

 

A Growing 20-Something

 

 

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Growing Pains

I’m sure we all remember growing pains. Those random aches in our joints growing up, so subtle and brief, finally resulting one day in a doctor-deemed “growth spurt.”

I wish they were only physical pains.

The aches that come with the growth of your soul, your mind, your heart – they hit so much deeper. Sometimes they’re brief, and sometimes they last for months at a time. There was a period of my life spent in depression, and now, looking back, I wonder if it was more of a powerful stage of growing pains in my heart. I came out broken and bruised, maybe not everything grew right, but I had more heart, more love, more empathy afterwards. I wonder if the things we see as so bad, so “negative,” are not sometimes just waves of growth, pushing us further upward toward the soil and the sun.

This past year has been a good one. I’ve been surrounded by the company of my dear mother, new and old friends, a new place in a new city, and our ridiculous pets. I’ve acquired a job that I’ve wanted for a long time that constantly deals with my favorite addiction: coffee. We’ve had teas, had adventures, strolled through the arboretum, taken walks. I’ve discovered so many interesting, beautiful people, I’ve gained friends and realized that I may not be as entirely hopeless in getting a date as I thought. I’ve made progress in some areas, gained knowledge, and learned more about – everything. I’ve had my prejudices challenged and diminished towards the Ever Wealthy, seen playing fields leveled and seen grace in action.

This past year has also been difficult. City life, I’ve learned, may not entirely be for me (something I would have completely disagreed with a few years ago). This job may also not be for me (something I would have certainly completely disagreed with for the past 8 years). I’ve learned that outside of community I wilt, that a job always surrounded by swarms of people and 8-minute timers sucks my soul, and that I can become so twisted from the base of who I am outside of a steady relationship with God and other people who try to have the same. I’ve remembered why I quit restaurant work and yet couldn’t bring myself to go back to assistant jobs. I feel more lost than I did a year ago, so much less sure of myself, of my life, of anything. The people that I thought would be steady strongholds undermine my confidence, say the most degrading things, cut others down with their words and laugh about it later in a show of insecurity and spite. The people I was unsure of, but looked up to, have turned out to be the most steady, kind, and sometimes misunderstood of anyone I’ve met. I’ve learned that first impressions are absolutely not everything, in fact, they’re usually nothing. And I’ve learned how good it feels to be honest, hence this post.

So, here I am, writing again for the first time in a long time, in the midst of a growth spurt.

I’m broken again, bruised again, breathing again. I’ve spent time with God, I’m figuring out life, and a spark of hope has been reignited. And I may even call up that guy and ask for another date, snide comments be blast. It’s time to live again.

Resolution Week 1

Resolution Week 1

First off I’m usually awful at doing things like this, but this year it feels different. It feels – natural 🙂

When it comes to resolutions I tend to set massive, very specific goals that I easily fall short of within a few weeks. Thankfully this year has started out on the right note.

A simple “deciding of” rather than “resolving to” and “wanting to” taking place of “needing,” for some odd reason, has made it easier.

As far as I can be I want go vegetarian, eventually transitioning to vegan (while avoiding as much dairy, sugar, and gluten as possible).

My reason for this is mainly all the lovely benefits:
– healthier organs
– more energy
– maximum nutrients
– taste buds readjusting to experience full flavors in veggies/fruit
– enhanced immune system
– weight loss
on and on and on they go! 🙂
And major bonus: minimizing the risk for diseases that have sprung up in the lives of my amazing grandparents.

Living in Texas makes it a bit challenging, living in the city makes it a bit easier, living on a tight budget makes it financially smarter.

The most wonderful bit about it is that with God’s help I know I can do it.

Since I finished (for the first time beginning to end!) my favorite journal last year I’ll be using this as a sort of food diary to post when I can.

This week has consisted of:

Juicing:
– Apples
– Kale
– Carrots
– Limes

– Cucumber

Eating:
– Hearty Vegetarian Chili w/ extra cilantro
– (on the transition day) Lean Turkey Black Bean Chili/Chili Blanco
– 3 slices cheese pizza (and 4-5 pepperonis – eek!)
– A chai cupcake (mega sugar and gluten gift haha)

– Banana, Coconut milk, and strawberry smoothie

Snacking On:
– Carrots

– Edamame Hummus

– Some Gluten-Free cracker-but-definitely-not-cracker thing from Trader Joe’s?

Drinking: Water, Peppermint, Green, and Chamomile Tea in place of usual coffee binge (slipped a Starbucks Cinnamon Dolce Frap – another gift from a generous friend! Eeh!)

Honestly I feel pretty great. My body seems to be doing its detox thing already, and hopefully with the next paycheck I can buy more in-season fruit/veggies in bulk to keep costs down and veg/fruit meals in!

I’m also starting up classes again on Monday, which thankfully includes a (hopefully) fabulous nutrition course. So stoked.

That’s it for now! Have a happy weekend!

Sincerely,

The friendly introvert 20-something

P.S. – Anyone know how to turn off the large one line spacing?